EXPLORING your SEXUAL SELF, Seeking Bliss with Daphne Paras - Bytes of Light
This week's episode features Daphne Paras, who comes to us today to talk about her chapter in our upcoming book as well as her pleasure tool she has birthed into the world.
The episode touches on her journey from her previous relationships, learning to love yourself both emotionally and sexually, and how it all led to her self-love device called The Seeker.
Daphne leads people by igniting the fire within them. She has found great satisfaction in facilitating corporate and private workshops, as well as one-on-one coaching. She excels at holding space and guiding people deep into the wisdom of their bodies, where she believes the magic happens.
Daphne facilitates workshops around empowerment, reclaiming your voice, sexuality, and returning to your authentic self. One of her favorite experiences for helping people be fully present in their bodies is Firewalking. Her work as a firewalk Master allows her to certify instructors and facilitate workshops guiding people into their fears and across 1800 degree coals.
Her journey led her to design and invent The Seeker, a sacred self-exploration and pleasure tool. She is on a mission to remove the shame and guilt and normalize open conversation and communication around sexuality. As well as inspire living in pleasure!
You can find out more about Daphne at her website: https://sacredseeker.com/
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[Episode Transcription]
welcome to Bytes of Light with Angel and Seth Rohrer we provide bite-sized nuggets of wisdom to feed your soul expand your awareness and free your mind to help you create a more beautiful today and a brighter tomorrow join us in our magical kitchen as we serve up another high Vibe snack for your soul
welcome everybody to bites of light snacks for your soul and today we're very excited I personally am very excited we have Daphne with us today and she is one of our featured authors in our bites of light evolving leadership for the spiritual entrepreneur book that is launching on Solstice June 21st we are so excited welcome Daphne welcome thank you so much for having me I am so happy that you said yes this is going to be such an amazing experience and you and I have already had many amazing heartfelt Soul connection moments in our journey over the last however many years it's been I can't even remember right now it's been since 2017. 17. yeah so I thought we could start there and just kind of fill everybody in about how our connection came and you know how we started this journey to have you now collaborating with us and writing in this book so why don't you start us off sounds great I'm actually going back now to 2016 when we met in Sedona Sedona was the first time that's right during our one of our certification trainings that's right and I totally remember the first time I saw you I was at the dining hall and you came up and grabbed a seat with me and we had like an instant magnetism towards each other yeah 17 that was so long ago it was amazing yeah and so going through that space we met there and you know when in in Sedona that this space that that we go and do all these amazing things on there's 12 vortexes on the property like it's it's a mega Retreat Center in Sedona and it is just magical itself so it literally blows you open even if you're not there having any facilitation absolutely and I was in the midst of my transformation trying to figure out what do I do with all this information and this Awakening that I had and I was just a sponge trying to soak everything up to be as open as I could be really just any experience I had and that was that was a huge step for me going there and being in it and participating and you know both as a student and then getting trained as a facilitator I remember feeling so expansive and the few women that I really connected with that week are all still in my life it was just such an expansive time for me personally too that like the universe every day I remember waking up at that point in my life and being like what magic is gonna happen today because every day I was so amazed and surprised by the different magic that would show up and that was a very magical week for me and the people that showed up they were of course perfectly aligned with what I needed right and then we ended up being co-facilitators of a group yes so you and I got to really dive in and hold space together as leaders gosh that was a nine month program
yeah that was a big container we got to hold together that's right so and then we ended up in Texas together [Music] God was extra magical um yeah I I was sick that week I remember I had gone on a crazy ski trip the week before and I was energetically depleted physically depleted and I left the workshop that day I tried to muster my energy to go and I was like I need to go back to the house and I don't think you would even left the house that day you might have just stayed behind anyway and I'll never forget sitting on that back porch and just one-on-one all day chill watching them build the stack of wood observing everything but just really getting to go really deep with you one-on-one in such an unusual setting because it was such a large group there yeah yeah and you know when you do that work the expectation is that you're in with the group you show up and and wherever you're at in that moment you do it but both of us for some reason chose to not participate which is you know against you know what were the norm and what we were the code yeah right and that afternoon we Dove deep and did our own shadow work and mirrored for each other which was you know the premise of what the whole retreat was for but you and I just I don't know if it was a resonance like I'm not I'm not even going to try to unpack why that happened I'm just so happy it did totally yeah and having that in person time to solidify I mean meeting in person then having those nine months online together and then really getting to go deep in person yeah I totally obviously connected us in a way that we're still connected so many years later yeah
[Music] through some relationship stuff with big teachings and now it's kind of funny that we kind of have paralleled each other through the last couple of years where we didn't have a lot of contact and you know now I'm married and on my mission and you're on your mission doing your thing it's like we we had those couple years to work together and then it was almost like here's the practicum go out into the world do your thing right get the lessons you need and now boom we're back together and that's what I love about these type of relationships is they're so Soul felt and heartfelt that you can literally go do your thing for a year and when you come back it's even stronger absolutely and what came up for me when you were talking about that when you said the parallel we didn't even know how parallel our lives were right and so we came back together and we were catching up and it's like oh wow we've done very very parallel Journeys so it makes total sense that we're coming back in now where we're both on our own missions we're both partnered with amazing people yeah so it it really makes sense why we're still in alignment and why we always have been yeah yeah and to come to this space now where we're co-creating this piece of medicinal art together and the amount of light codes and information that is being infused into this book it's Epic and I specifically did not reach out and ask to read your chapter ahead of time because I wanted to save it and and see without because I didn't want to because before you know when we had that one day in Texas there was a lot of instruction and direction for both of us right like we really dropped in and taught each other a lot of stuff and I found in this space because I did handhold a lot of a lot of our authors and help them and and get out pull out from them the medicine that that was needed for this book there was just this full trust that you had it and then if you needed me that you would reach out thank you that's beautiful yeah I'm just so proud of you and I'm so excited to to read what you what you've put so it's even going to be a surprise for me that's exciting yeah right it's so exciting so if you if you want to share what
how did you decide to write what you wrote and just kind of give some of that little back story of and why you said yes like what was the hook what was the poll the hook in the pull was my trust in you and and Seth even though I didn't know you Seth but the I know you through through Angel right I mean I trust Angel and I followed your story and when you guys got married and you met and Teo I was like oh my God like I could feel it and I was so lit up and so excited for you and I think it's so amazing to have partners that are co-creators also there's when you get to intermingle all of those different energies I know how Amplified that can be so it was easy for me to be curious and interested in it and I had a lot going on at the time I was launching my own business and dealing with advertising and marketing and getting shut down after I launched and you know all of these pieces and you kept reaching out and you're like I'm really getting a hit that you're supposed to be a part of this and the final day you sent me a message I had cleared other space off my plate and I was like oh that's a yes today so it was just like and I think we actually hopped on the phone like that day that's right and I was like yep let's talk but it felt that day like yeah this is it I've been kind of pushing it aside saying not right now I'm busy I have too much on my plate and that day magically a whole bunch cleared off my plate where I could really feel into it really sink into it but the trust and the interest was there so it was just kind of a no-brainer when that space opened up and you reached out and I was like oh yeah that makes a lot of sense and you know when things like that happen you have to go with it you know like the universe was like it lined everything up served it's me on a plate and I wasn't gonna walk away from it I've I've learned that less than a few a few times in my past yeah yeah so the as far as my story and how I chose this piece of it The Awakening I had in 2016 which was at the pyramids in Copa Mexico is what really shifted my trajectory to meet you later that year that was in February I think and then I Met You in September of that year in Sedona but it not only shifted us into meeting but it shifted everything that I am today it was the most drastic it led to my realization that I was in a really unhappy marriage and that whole process of trying to fix it we spent 14 months really trying to work on it and get to where things were a compromise and they couldn't be and thank goodness you know whenever I think about some of the things I asked for just to keep the family unit together and live an okay life I'm like thank God he said no you know like like thank God I had that like extreme extreme shift into what I am now and for me the biggest piece revolved around my sexuality I was in this marriage where he wasn't able to be intimate with me and I couldn't have that anymore and so for me going through that process of oh my gosh I have shut this down in my life and how do I resume and it was that trip in San Antonio where I made the connection about our womb space being this source of Creative Energy and source of life and how I had completely disconnected from it and shut myself down and so during this process for me it was like oh wow like how do I reconnect to that and for me reconnecting to that sacred sexuality space Within Myself is what really started opening me up to unlimited potential and really feeling passionate about sharing that with other women and at first you know I had a lot of Shame and guilt around it so I didn't talk about it and as I started opening up woman after woman was like that's me that's my story whether it was from you know severe trauma physical or emotional or mildish trauma it was this Common Thread could even childbirth trauma right this Common Thread that it was like nope I'm severing that connection I'm not a sexual being that feels scary that feels foreign and how I learned to navigate it and how I learned to really go into a deep dive with it felt like I had to share that with the world like that's my duty to really help I mean for men for women for All Humans honoring that sacred connection to our sexuality and not just connecting to it but really fueling it and keeping those Pathways open so that's the basis of my chapter was kind of my journey into figuring that path out and then some medicine around how it how to maintain it and stay with it
it's important it's important information you know if we look at the Shocker system you know the Basin sacral chakra that is our our foundation and our connection to relationships relationships with other humans and relationships within ourselves so you've just you've just taken that sacral chakra medicine and expanding it into the world and and living from that space and and that's where we need to be it humans need to understand that it's okay to be inside your soul basket and it's okay to have some fun while you're in it exactly I had a colleague reach out to me recently and someone said I'm speaking it per event and they said I can't believe you're affiliated with her I saw her on Facebook with some sex tool and he ended the call and because she said she's not spiritual because I saw her on Facebook and I was like that's like the basis of my spirituality you know right and it was interesting to me and my first reaction was like you know there was a point in my life where it would have threatened me too right because so many of us are shot down or gone through periods where we're shut down where when someone comes in with that energy and they're comfortable with it it's uncomfortable because it's such a a drastic difference from what we're feeling so I had some compassion for her too but I was like damn okay when you look at Society worldwide I mean those those forces that would try to hold us back want to keep us separate and connection comes like like Angel was saying connection comes to that root and sacral chakra so to make sex shameful almost every major religion on the planet makes sex something that is secretive and and and creates shame around it if you're doing it for anything other than making more babies and so even as we step into our spirituality people think oh I've let go of my agreements around the the church and God as as Christianity has set it up so I've stepped into this very spiritual path of acknowledging Mother Earth and and all these things which is great and they think I've done the work I'm done but they've only done the work around those few agreements and all these other lingering Agreements are hanging around why this and that is you know speaks to why this woman would feel offended and call you not spiritual because she had this lingering belief that there's something shameful around sex that she's not ready to address absolutely too deep so it's just part of that it highlights what how really I mean honestly truly amazing the forces that would try to keep everybody down and separate I'm truly uh I mean I guess diabolical might be the word but it's it's actually very very well thought out and very impressive really when you look at this level they've done such a good job on a worldwide basis of creating separation and that's just one more level of separation and as we you know as we ignite that passion again we take the shame out of everything not just sex we take the shame out of the thoughts that our brain creates that are separate from us just acknowledge like oh my brain had this really weird thought that isn't me and say it out loud bring it into the light and and all of those things start to fall away and then we start to recognize that we're not the body we're not the brain we're not these shameful thoughts we are beings that are all connected in a beautiful way and any way that you bring whether it's through sexuality or heart connection whatever all of those ways that you bring to connect and recognize that we are one not separate is going to move the whole dream of the planet further you know raise that that vibration so I would to say that it's the same every Power every path that brings you to connectedness is a path that is bringing the whole dream everybody on the planet back to what we truly are so I love that you're doing it in a way that only you are uniquely designed to do through your the sex toy that you created in this business like yeah make it you know making it something that people can just talk about yeah and Seth when when you said shame like that resonates with me so much because that is such a big part of my mission is eliminating the shame and the guilt because women I work with adults they have Shame about experiences they had as young teenagers and we're talking 30 40 years later we're still carrying around that shame and that baggage that serves no purpose and being a mom of teenage daughters I'm like if I can help you guys prevent some of the shame and the guilt by normalizing Pleasure and sexuality and self-pleasure and it's and I'm bold enough to be able to do it you know you mentioned the sex toy I like to call it a sacred sex tool because I don't think it's a toy like it's serious business and you have to open up serious Pathways inside yourself in order to really go there and experience The Depths but really just normalizing the conversation around it and people will ask me me you know what do you do for a living and you know it's one of the hats I wear but just normalizing the conversation around it and I've had amazingly good conversations with strangers who all are like yeah that makes total sense to me and you know one of my favorite mottos is like the world would be a better place if women were more orgasmic do you agree not one person has disappeared please no it's like yeah totally I hate more feelings of euphoria in my life no thank you
exactly and it's you know it's so much greater than sexuality obviously but that is such an integral part of the connection and Seth just like you said we'll do all this other work but we'll forget about that piece and that's where I was I was like give me this information give me this knowledge I want to learn it oh but don't talk about that because I've already blocked that off and that's when I had that aha that hold on a second I I can't be full if that's blocked off just the same as if our throat chakra is blocked or our heart you know any of those are these integral parts and really unpacking the the why why is there all this shame and guilt and we're passing it down generation to generation because I mean I grew up with so much shame and guilt and rules about oh you can't self-pleasure and you know it doesn't make me uncomfortable at all to talk to my kids about it but I'm in the minority you know the other moment will be like you you talk about what and I'm like well why not especially with what kids have access to these days like I would rather have those conversations they are going to be exposed to it one way or another exactly and I would rather and guess what the kids will like we'll have sleepovers here and they'll ask me questions that they could find online and they would rather have a trusted adult to talk to about it so like yay and really yay and trying to change that near narrative and normalize it and I'll tell you when I first launched it was this huge expansion and contraction I was like of course what have I just done and my credit card processor shut me down that day and I was devastated and I was like what and a Healer friend of mine was like how cool is it that what you're birthing into the world is so big that you'd get shut down exactly yep thank you for that reframe you know you're on it when you're getting the resistance you know we've been subjugated for so long in so many ways and this is this is a point this is a button this is a trigger and to have enough energy to burst through that it's incredible and I'm just so proud of you and so honored to be part of your journey it's just incredible and I remember our conversation I remember that day in Texas on that deck and we dove into this and it's just so cool that you stayed with it that you stayed with it because you had people around you that didn't want you to do this you had that in your inner world and you still did not allow the subjugation yeah and it's so interesting to think back to then and then going through the long-term relationship I had and then getting out of that and then being ready right I held it all of that time and I sat with it and I didn't do a thing and then when we wonder you know how does our path happen and why do these people come and go and that determination and that knowing and then when my current partner came in and he was like hell yeah you're gonna do this you know just such a different energy and I actually felt like that was my missing piece was having that really grounded masculine energy that had my back because it was unchartered territory for me to go so public about something so personal and having that to hold me yeah that was kind of my last missing piece in order to to launch well that's that's the role that that we're here to play and that's why like I said those powers that would would hold us back have been so focused on subjugating women yes yeah men get subjugated too in ways but the focus has been since the beginning of time of the control of the the patriarchy has been to subjugate women because that's the real threat and so as men are waking up to being men and not being scared little boys that are trying to subjugate everyone around them to hold their whatever this false sense of security this power and men are waking up to that and being what we were here what the masculine energy is intended to do in this universe and that is to support the feminine energy and creation you know it it takes both yeah absolutely it's you know I love hearing about other men that are waking up I mean that's and stepping into that role of support you know we're part of the creation but the role is much more of a a support and yeah I just I just love hearing it yeah and I mean I know you guys get it but when you have that Foundation of support you get to grow exponentially you know when you have that safety that foundation and you grow together but you also have that ability to expand into everything that you're meant to be as well yeah well and that's that is the basis of this book you know balancing the Divine masculine and feminine within and you know first you have to learn how to hold yourself and then when you find somebody that can hold to the capacity that you can hold yourself there's no limits to what you can manifest what you can do in the world and you know I we're living it and and working through it and creating medicine so that other people can understand what it looks like and I think the biggest word is trust you know you said it earlier you know when you and I were there and you came in because you trusted me that's because you trust my warrior mm-hmm you know I can hold and you're not going to get dropped in my space right and you when I'm in that Warrior space for you your divine feminine does feel safe and protected and loved and can come out and can blossom and can do it knowing you're held you know and then I can switch back into my goddess and allow Seth to hold me you know to be able to do that Divine dance with with humans and understand and that's also why I trust you I trust your Warrior it's so amazing to hear you talk about it I have the chills everywhere because one I didn't have the words for when I said the fact that you two are doing this together and I know what that connection is but this is also in my chapter I had a intuitive during this Awakening period for like three weeks I cried non-stop I didn't know what was going on in my world and her advice to me was Daphne harness your goddess energy but I didn't because I ran everything my husband at the time traveled five days a week for work I was a single mom basically with financial backing I ran the house I ran the kids every decision and I had never had that where I could just melt into something or into someone so when you put it in those words it totally resonated with me is yeah exactly like we are supposed to be those Warriors too but then we get to sink back into that goddess energy and that softness and the receiving and the creativity and the femininity that we don't get when we're running things all the time so yeah it's really beautiful way you just phrase that for me to process it yeah well and the word that was relentlessly
pinged into my brain for years from the Ruiz Family when I was doing the apprenticeship with them was surrender surrender surrender surrender you know how many times I heard that word until you did it because the warrior within like for you and I so so if there's any women listening who identify with the energy that that Daphne and I are bringing across your Warrior has to surrender to allow the warrior to come in and hold that's a good point right I mean I I hear women say a lot of times like well how come there's no good man how come I can't find a good man how come we can only attract what we're vibrating at so I mean I don't want to be the guy that says it's you but yeah I can't attract a good woman if it's not I'm not he's not going to say it all said if you don't surrender and allow them to do what they're supposed to do it's not gonna happen and in Philadelphia it's not you as a being you are a perfect being that deserves to be supported in a perfect way it is the choices that you are making currently and you can make new choices yeah so that's the caveat there it's not to say that anybody doesn't deserve it we all deserve it yeah you deserve it because you're here you made the choice to come here and live an amazing life of wealth and luxury start choosing that yeah my my Joe was dreaming of his perfect relationship and he said after I had my vision I was like okay so now who do I have to be to attract that it's like dang day exactly and so often we forget about that second piece it's like this is what you want this is my vision but it's like okay if that's really what I want what work do I need to do what do I need to clean up where do I need to be and you know surrendering man I my most of my life I mean I still am a controller personality type and you know when I get into that mode now I can self-medicate by just organizing a drawer right instead of trying to control the world around me right how can I soothe myself clean out the junk drawer Daphne and you'll have your little piece of heaven I love that I've been really observing that and guess what I love being a controller I can get a lot done I can you know walk into a room and navigate and give orders and Direction and make things happen but I don't want to be a controller in all the areas of my life and so it's like where do I get to soften and where are those patterns and catching myself in those patterns and sometimes pulling back and being like okay I see it I see it then other times apologizing and saying can you give me another chance here because I don't want to run that energy and it it doesn't it doesn't work right I mean if if I want to lead a life by myself it could work but if I want true partnership it is it's that give and take but yes surrender I'll share with you a meditation I did once that stands out in my head for surrender I was doing a visualization of a river flowing and I was on a raft and I was hitting Rapids and I had a choice whether I could take the or and continue trying to paddle upstream and fight the Rapids or I could use the or and push myself off to the racks every now and then maybe still get bruised a little bit but have fun and hold on for the ride because either way I'm going to end up at the end of the river I can fight it the whole way and try to control it and navigate it or I can be like let's ride these waves and that has been the most powerful visualization that I returned back to it's like Daphne are you trying to fight it and go upstream or can you just have fun and maybe it's a little bumpier but you're still going to end up the same place at the end of the day or the end of the life I love that analogy I'm a rafter cool yeah swiftwater rescue and rafting is one of my favorite hobbies so amazing yeah that's a great analogy yeah yeah and that's that's what it is it's it's it's trying to find that balance within yourself and then within your partnership and for those of us who have been the strong independent warrior women it is a constant it is a constant awareness that has to be right here you're allowed to surrender you're allowed to be held I had to tell myself that you're loud I had to give myself permission for my warrior to put the Sword Down you know and when Seth and I first got together I went I went hardcore with it because I'm like I need to stop these patterns and when I moved here I literally would not allow myself to drive I love it wherever we went he drove because I needed I needed to sit in that space of No Control so I even gave myself exercises to to allow myself to sink in deeper to and it also helps me you know trust deeper and I think that's a really important thing for people to understand is from the goddess aspect we have to trust the warrior it's more important for the warrior to hear I trust you than I love you even it's so true right and so if you don't trust your partner you're not in alignment [Music] and when you gift that trust and you express that trust then they get to expand even more exactly what we want right we want that from that expansion yeah and so if we Circle back to you know this this sacred tool that you've created for you to even be able to expand deeper and further into that because we know that sexual Union when you open that Kundalini line and you're up in the freaking Cosmos and don't know whether you're crazy or not if you don't trust your partner to bring you back into your body after blowing your mind you know you that that trust has to deepen even more if you're even going to start experimenting with that kind of stuff it's another important element absolutely and I mean I really started as a self practice for me because I had neglected myself so long and realized okay this this has to start inside because the thought of being naked with another human it would stop my heartbeat you know I it was like I couldn't even wrap my head around it and so it was such a beautiful way for me to just honor myself and celebrate myself in a way that I felt comfortable and safe because I hadn't had that kind of masculine energy before right and I could breathe then at the thought of okay I could kiss someone okay and I could take it to this next level and
as I'm sure you both totally understand because it sounds like we have similar relationships the expansion that Joe and I have together every day surprises me it's like I knew somewhere inside of me this existed but I I didn't experience it in my life and my extended family and my friend Circle so to have that you know my my wishes for like oh gosh if everybody could have this kind of relationship how amazing would the world be right is this deep connection partnership and the constant expansion and like no contraction and the sexuality pieces obviously such a fun but deep expansive space to play with with other humans and the the trust that goes into that you know when we talk about trust it's for me it felt life or death even though it wasn't I absolutely agreed it was you know to have another human inside of my body I mean that to me is like that ultimate trust and openness that you have to have with someone yeah absolutely yeah absolutely so this tool that you've made tell us a little bit about that sure so that story started in and very end of 2017 I had a partner who said he knew my body better than mine because he got me to squirt and while I thought that was like super cool I was like f that I want to know my body better than anybody because he was right my body better than me and I came home and I was like okay what toys do I have what tools are in my toolbox that can replicate that and I had a nothing that could reach that spot and I started doing research and talking to my friends and asking strangers you know like okay about an academy and a bus and my Master's is in health education so I had sexuality education training and no one ever talked about squirting so I became kind of like the mad scientist around this whole phenomenon what is it how does it happen and so that was my my goal with the Seeker it's called The Seeker is to have a tool where women can explore all of the insides of their vagina because our hands don't reach like a partner's hands would reach inside of us and maybe our partners hands are smaller and they can't reach all those places but to really get in touch with all of those juicy feel-good spots that maybe we've had grazed before or maybe we've never even noticed and I found it to be so healing for myself to connect with those places is and really be like oh that feels amazing yeah that not so much and of course it varies throughout the month throughout the year like different ages we're going to have places that feel better different moods but it felt very empowering to me to be able to explore myself internally in a way I never had before and when I was going through my sex love and relationship coaching certification we had to self-pleasure 30 minutes a day five days a week in addition to daily meditation and educational practices and we you know there's like a cohort of 300 of us all complaining about our wrists and how sore they're getting from self-pleasuring and so I also didn't designed it ergonomically shaped the self-pleasuring injury exactly so that by using very light pressure with your hand on the outside you could feel very heavy pressure on the inside of your body so that you know if you wanted to have 30 minute session five days a week you would have no carpal tunnel syndrome right and yeah I mean it was this this beautiful process of having to have drawings drawn up and then prototypes made and I found a local manufacturer that's 11 minutes from my house that makes them and you know all of it was downloads the logo the colors that it was just all like I would just be like oh I got it oh I got it and it was just constant confirmation that I was supposed to be doing this you know that this was yep yep yep all along the way so that was a really beautiful experience and I've had equal amounts of men reach out to me as women and they're asking about it for their wives or their you know what what's the deal with this and you know private messages of course and and I love it and I'm like yeah celebrate your woman and support her and if you want to get up for her awesome don't have the expectation that she's gonna invite you into it just yet though you know don't let that be your reason right are that comfortable and if that's where you guys are at amazing but women don't need any more pressure and and so with the tool I have audio meditations and visualizations to really help people drop into their body because that's where the magic really happened for me when I could really get out of my head and into my body and I feel like all the modalities I use that's the constant theme is like get out of your head and sink into the magic of your body and sexuality is the same self-pleasure is the same and it wasn't until I really learned that that I could open up for these epic sexual experiences where I could really like feel the pleasure and run it through my chakras and feel it throughout my whole body so that's that's part of it it's just it's a journey you know I have this as a journey for people you don't just buy it and try it and if you don't like it so what it's like no learn your body connect to your body open up these pathways is and experience your body like you never have before and who cares if you have an orgasm or not that's not the goal the goal is to really stay connected to yourself and obviously you know orgasms feel amazing but the the pressure we have like I don't need to add to that you know like there's already so much pressure there it's just like no this is really about just celebrating yourself and I have a PDF on there that's free download of pleasure spots for women and Anatomy because I've learned so many women even very experienced women that have birthed children and had sexual partners they don't know basic anatomy so there's that education component too which you know I'm obviously super passionate about so yeah I really feel like I wear like my health educator hat in the seeker and it's like yeah this is this is where I want to be this is not some weird uncomfortable pornographic like no this is this is serious business actually it sounds to me like it is like what you're saying this is a healing modality this isn't you are literally creating a healing modality absolutely absolutely right and in there you define surrender because I think a lot of people we say surrender and people go cool to what right but getting out of your head surrendered to the feeling the energies that flow all around us you know surrender to the experience of life and quit trying to think it you know listening to your intuition is a form of surrender listening to your heart learning how to access and understand the the chakra energies as a form of surrender there's it's not just like there's one way that you surrender and then it's all good just like dealing with agreements so you kind of defined it as to me that's what it means in general it's get out of your head your mind was never meant to run your life your mind was meant to run your body your body alive it's a very Advanced Mechanical suit that we walk around and in the brains the operating system but at some point you were told no your heart's wrong and that's where the truth comes from in our body so we said oh that's wrong I'm going to start listening to what my mind says surrender back into that body that's where the that's where all the magic happens I mean from the word from the beginning of this episode really we've been talking about surrender and following intuition we wouldn't be sitting here today we wouldn't have you in our lives if it wasn't for surrender yeah on some level even back then on some level surrendering into your intuition I just need to be here I don't know why I'm just gonna do it and then you make these magical connections and that builds and builds and builds so I just want to point that out that surrender is get out of the Mind and you know Seth there's actually very few things that help me really get out of my mind when I was thinking about it skiing when I ski really fast I I can't calculate anything I'm just like in the zone and it's like meditative and really powerful sexual experiences whether with myself or a partner you can't be processing in your head if you're really a part of that so it makes sense to me why that resonated for me is surrender and for such a controller why that's such a good modality because I can totally relinquish control there as well
now could you step in into your goddess right yay
[Laughter] yeah it's programming that we all carry to a certain degree and some of us carry it deeper than others you know especially when we were put in positions early on in our early adulthood you know we take on those roles and the unprogramming you know and and that's what Seth and I are here to do this is part of part of your modality it is leading by example of what healthy relationship looks like not only here but in a partnership and you know that we can live happier healthier lives and there are tools out there for us to do that with and that's what this book is all about that's why we're pulling in powerhouses like you that are like literally we're this is way showing you are literally creating a new healing modality for women and it's incredible yeah and I know we're kind of getting close to the end but before we wrap up I want to point out something else you said which was you had the opportunity to try to fix fix this marriage as though it was broken and not just a lack of alignment right but that's the mentality and you're ready to settle for okay because that was better than shitty and and I love that for you it worked out to where you didn't have to decide whether to settle between okay or not because what I'm here to say is [ __ ] that you're here to live amazing if you're trying to create okay you're so far out of alignment that you're probably gonna have to burn it all down and start over which I know can be scary and that's why there are guides and practitioners out there to help you now whether it's a psychologist whether you want to go into Western medicine or or more Eastern or shamanic type of you know methodologies get help but if you're settling for good or shitty you have a choice to make because amazing is possible for everyone absolutely and and Angel I want to just circle back to something you said about leading by example and I think that is at my core such an integral piece of connecting with other leaders but living in alignment with myself that way and I wrote that chapter because that is my example and Seth I did have to make the choice for him to move out you'll see it in the book but I mean I really had to push that once I knew and that expansion and that belief and it's it's like Integrity right like I chose this life that doesn't feel right to me and my hope is that that's contagious for the leaders too and the teachers too and that that starts to differentiate between us more and more yeah and it's great to hear those those stories right because so many people out there listening and watching see see people living this amazing life and go how come it's so easy for them how come they have everything and I don't I'm telling you it wasn't easy yeah it's not easy we created it and it's the challenges are you know it gets easier that's the part I will I will also and this is the question does it really get easier do we just keep collecting these tools and this knowing that it's like yeah we can handle everything because we know it's all part of the path sometimes right I would say it gets easier the same way that uh you know doing uh I mean well it's a really hard trampoline trick well yeah it becomes muscle memory right right if you're going to learn double back talk it takes a long time to learn how to do it but once you do it it then becomes a tool we're literally building spiritual muscles just like you would build physical muscles in the gym right and so the more you do it it just becomes part of your life in the beginning yeah you have to have awareness around it and you have to have coaches to help you stay on track and and you have to make sure that you have the people in your world that cheerlead you that is the one thing you will have those people who do not want to see you is succeed and step out of that timeline so it is if you stay true to yourself and you trust your intuition you will get what you want I Surrender and that is part of what Seth and I are creating this community and it started with this book pulling in master healers that have done the work that did walk through the mud that did challenge the agreements challenged the other external voices around them saying don't do that don't step out of the narrative that I've created for you you know we're Crea the people that have said yes to this book are powerhouses in their own medicine and we are actually this is the first time we're announcing it we are creating a community an online community that is launching May 1st and all of the authors will be invited to come and facilitate and do things and be a part of that Community as Master Teachers and so you will listeners get to come and play with not only Seth and I but Daphne and all the other people that are going to come and do this with us you know our mission was very clear just like Daphne's mission was very clear and we want to be able to provide leaders that you can trust because we know that there are leaders out there or coaches or whatever you want to whatever label they're calling themselves that aren't in alignment so part of our mission is to provide a safe space for you to come and do the work with people who have also done the work in their categories because what I've learned through this whole process of the last 10 years of my Awakening do not put all your eggs in one basket do not give your power away to one teacher make sure that you figure out what you want to learn and find the person that can give you that piece and then go find another piece and that's why we're creating a community of leaders and we were very specific with who we picked and Daphne's our sacral shocker Queen right so so you know we were very specific in how we created what we're creating and we would love for you to come and join us in may I go for pleasure princess pleasure princess
I like that too and then Angela when you said that these things came easy they did but we also had done enough work to receive it right so that's to surrender into that space and you know when I think of it getting easier it our mindset shifts too I mean for me it's like now something comes up and I'm like oh what was that what work do I have to do there because I've had the support and the love of other people in communities and I know I'll get to the other side of it and that's the biggest value in the community piece yeah maybe not easier but the effort becomes less effort exactly thank you so much for joining us today pleasure it was amazing it was amazing and I cannot wait to see how this goes for you tell people how they can find your medicine absolutely my the Seeker website it's called sacred seeker
www.sacredseeker.com and the Seeker is on there and feel free to connect with me on social media under Daphne Paris p-a-r-a-s awesome excellent thank you lots of love girl thank you so much see you soon and until the next episode thank you for sharing your time and energy with us the best way to help us spread this message is to rate review And subscribe this episode impacted you in any way share it with others post about it on social media put something in the comments also check out our website for upcoming events and books at
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